Disenfranchised Grief and Depression

Disenfranchised grief is grief experienced by an individual that is not openly acknowledged, socially validated or publicly observed. The loss experienced is real, but survivors are not accorded the "right to grieve" by anyone around them. An individual may have an intense and multifaceted reaction to a loss, yet those around him are completely ignorant or invalidating about the sadness that person may feel. Society at large simply is not comfortable with grief and for the most part completely ignores many instances of grief.

Some examples of disenfranchised grief are:

1) Loss of a pregnancy due to miscarriage
a. People say stupid things like "you can always have another baby

2) Loss of a pregnancy due to abortion
a. There is no public venue and complete lack of permission to grieve the loss of voluntary pregnancy termination

3) Loss of a child in an adoption process
a. Complete lack of understanding by society at large

4) Death of an ex-husband or ex-wife
a. People say, "Wow! You should be glad they are out of your life now!

5) Break up of a gay couple
a. Complete lack of acknowledgment by society as a whole.

When a person is in a disenfranchised grief circumstance, they are unable to process the emotions involved with that loss. They will do this usually completely alone and with no support system. The grieving process is always best done in community. It is important for others to share the tears and the pain of the loss. Yet in the instances mentioned above, parties involved in these losses are completely abandoned and isolated in their pain.

While there is a great movement of grief support groups in our nation, even those are probably not going to touch on the above mentioned losses, unless someone finds their special niche of group. They are available but sometimes hard to find.

The grieving process can be a long, difficult and painful process. The ideal way to grieve, again, is to have someone walk that valley of pain with you. It is the isolation and the abandonment that heaps even more coals of pain onto one's heart in a disenfranchised grief situation.

Without validation and confirmation from another person, the emotions of sadness get pushed down. Eventually a person with disenfranchised grief will find themselves with a full blown case of depression.

Some common signs of depression are:

1) Lack of interest in things that used to bring joy

2) Difficulty getting out of bed in the morning

3) Sluggish, tired feeling

4) Unable to sleep or restless sleep

5) General feeling of sadness

6) Crying spells

7) Feeling fearful

Disenfranchised grief needs community for healing. If you are suffering from depression caused by disenfranchised grief it is important that you find someone to walk the valley of sadness with you. You can either find a professional who is trained in grief counseling or find the particular support group that would pertain to you. At the very least, it is important for you to find a friend who could listen to your story and who would be a safe place to cry with you.

The Characteristics of Highly Creative People

I recently ran a creative thinking workshop for some business students. At the end of the session one of the students asked me if I could spot a creative thinker. To my mind the question is moot as everyone whether or not they realise it thinks creatively at some point. As I pondered the question however I began to realise there were some characteristics that seemed to be present in just about every person I would categorise as highly creative.

Flexibility - its important to be flexible and to consider the possibility that problems and challenges may have more than one answer or solution. A creative thinker needs the flexibility to realise when something isn't working and its time to change the approach. Many of the creative thinkers I have met enjoyed the fact that there was more than one possibility, more than one answer. They revelled in the variety and often disliked it when they felt they were being forced into a corner.

Intense curiosity - Creative thinkers tend to ask a lot of questions. They have a deep curiosity about the world around them that is accompanied by an almost childlike excitement. This can be cultivated simply taking a proper look at the world around you and realising how fantastic and bizarre it really is. Many people never really take the time to do this.

Positive attitude - it is extremely hard to think creatively when you are feeling negative. Possibly this is linked to the intense curiosity (its also hard to be curious about things when you feel negative). People who are creative generally have a positive outlook and mindset on life. The common image of a creative who is emotionally unstable and subject to manic depression is stereotypical - they do exist but they tend to have bouts of hyper creativity followed by a depression during which there is very little creativity at all. The type of person I'm about in this article is a lot more emotionally balanced than this.

Strong motivation and determination - True creative thinking is exciting and energising but its not always easy. For it to succeed you need a high level of motivation and determination. The creative thinkers I have met tend to be high energy individuals whose speech patterns and movements tend to be pretty fast. A conversation with them can be amusing as they pepper you with questions and then change the subject completely.

Fearlessness - People who are highly creative tend to worry little about whether or not they are right or wrong. They are generally excited by the ideas or concepts they have come up with and are exploring. In my view this is fantastic but it does need to be balanced by the need to achieve a measurable outcome especially in business.

I honestly believe it is worth knowing these characteristics. If for example you own a business you will now be able to spot the creative thinkers in your workforce and deploy them where they can add the most value. If you simply want to be more creative yourself then you now know some of the characteristics you need to nurture and develop. Good Luck!

Living With Bipolar Disorder

Bipolar disorder, also known as manic depression, is characterized by extreme swings in mood, energy level, and cognitive ability. These dramatic swings are much more serious than the usual ups and downs everyone experiences. A person who is bipolar can go from manically happy and energized to so depressed they can't even move. These swings can be quick or very long-lasting.

The Damage Done by Bipolar Disorder

During manic periods, you may have lots of ideas and energy. Some people who suffer from this don't eat or sleep during their manic episodes. They may be overly aggressive, irritable and/or impulsive. This impulsiveness can lead to risky behavior and bad decision making.

When in a depressive episode, a person with bipolar disorder feels worthless and lethargic. It's not uncommon for people to contemplate suicide. It's easier to recognize that a person has bipolar disorder by these depressive episodes, which may last for days or even weeks.

In severe cases, the swings may be so bad that the person can't function at all. They may lose their job, drop out of school, have family problems, or have trouble with social relationships. Many people with bipolar disorder attempt suicide.

These cycles can be extremely rapid or they can last as long as a couple of weeks. Some people with severe bipolar disorder are never in a state of balance between the two extremes.

What Causes This Issue?

Most people develop bipolar disorder symptoms in their teens or early adult years. More than half do so before the age of 25. There are a number of risk factors that make developing the disorder more likely. It contains a genetic component. If you have a close relative who suffers from the condition, it's more likely that you will too.

This is caused by changes in brain chemistry. Certain physical problems that affect regular functioning of the brain can cause it. Trauma or damage to the brain can as well. Sometimes, it's triggered by extreme stress, traumatic life events, or major life changes.

Is Bipolar Disorder Treatable?

Yes, it is completely treatable. Many people who suffer from it seek treatment and are able to live happy, productive lives. There is no cure but like any other mental illness, it can be successfully managed through the many treatment options available.

Treatments include:

• Medications to treat symptoms and keep an emotional balance


• Techniques for recognizing triggers that cause manic and depressive episodes


• Individual and group therapy


• Lifestyle changes that can help such as dietary changes, exercising and learning to cope more effectively with stress.

Treatment is overwhelmingly effective but there's one barrier that keeps people from getting the help they need. This barrier is their failure to recognize the warning signs. When bipolar episodes goes undiagnosed, this is when the real damage occurs. If you think you may suffer from bipolar disorder, talk to a doctor immediately.

Funny Life Quotes to Slap the Stress Away

Life is full of pressures and stress and everyone has a bunch of worries. There is no one who is stress free. Even a five year old kid has his own problems. Stress affects everybody whether one is rich or poor, literate or illiterate, men or women.

Some people are stressed because they don't have enough time; some are stressed because they have too much spare time. Some people are stressed because they hate the people they work with and don't like their job and there are some others who are stressed because they are unemployed. From kid to young to elder everyone is stressed.

In such a time, where stress is leading to depression and unprecedented health problems, Funny Life Quotes can help you tickle your funny bone. One of the best way to reduce stress is to laugh a lot and this is what funny life quotes do. They give you belly laugh and keep your laughter motor going on smoothly.

Everyone must keep a sense of the humorous part of life. If you really want to enjoy life, then you must look at the humorous part of the life. It will also help you to tackle any problem of life with a smile on face. Funny Life quotes remind you of the Fun and Humor Side of your Life. Reading them will certainly help you kick-out all the stress of your life.

Have you ever been in a situation in social gathering where you don't have words to describe your point of view or you don't have something funny to say when everyone is cracking jokes and having fun? There is no worse situation than this that causes stress.

You can get over to this situation by learning some funny Sayings and Funny Life Quotes. There are thousand of funny sayings and funny Life Quotes websites available on internet. Try to learn at least twenty funny quotes a day and at the end of the month you would be able to learn six hundred funny quotes.

Now, next time whenever you are in social gathering, just throw in some funny life quotes and funny sayings. Let everyone know that how humorous and funny person you are and be famous for your words.

With the advent of Internet technology, now finding information on everything is as easy as counting 1 2 3. We need not to go outside somewhere to find out information as our

Ancestors do. There are literally thousand of websites on the internet with hundred of funny life quotes to read. With so much of quotes, you can easily find out the funny quote as per your need and situation.

Using Proper Funny Life quotes on proper situation can help you set apart from Boring peoples and helps you being a funny person which everyone loves to be.

8 Questions To Evaluate Your Inner Circle

"There are 3 types of people in the world today. There are 'well poisoners' who discourage you and stomp on your creativity and tell you what you can't do. There are 'lawn mowers', people who are well-intentioned but self-absorbed; they tend to their own needs, mow their own lawns and never leave their yards to help another person. Finally there are 'life enhancers', people who reach out to enrich the lives of others, to lift them up and inspire them. We need to be life-enhancers and we need to surround ourselves with life-enhancers."Walt Disney

One of the most crucial decisions we make in life is who to include in our Inner Circle. An Inner Circle can be a group of professionals, such as one's tax attorney, accountant, health and fitness trainer, or success and leadership coach. It can also include our work teams which we build and create. And of course, it will include close friends and family.

Years ago, when I worked with an architectural firm, our firm often participated in what our city called The Showcase of Homes. It was often required that we bar the entrance to each "showcase room" with a red velvet rope. You could see into the room or space, however, you were not allowed to enter.

Likewise as you and I choose who we will allow into our Inner Circle, we want to be discerning as to whom we allow to influence us. Consider your current team members, friends, and professional associates. If you were to use Walt Disney's descriptions utilized in the above quotes, how would you describe them?

Here are 8 great questions to ask as you consider your Inner Circle:?

• Who encourages you?


• Who speaks truth into your life? One of our friends describes a true friend as one who... "hurts me with a Truth, but never comforts me with a lie!"


• Who believes in you, even when you find it hard to believe in yourself?


• Who listens deeply to you? Who knows your heart?


• Who is there for you when you've failed?


• Who do you seek out when you need mercy, compassion, or comfort?


• Who can you turn to when you need emotional support in times of discouragement or depression?


• Professionally, who do you turn to for skills training and trustworthy advice? For leadership support?

Sure, it can be challenging and sometimes lonely to let go of friends and associates who have been a part of your life. Yet, as professional speaker Les Brown encourages us: "Some people should remain in our heart, but not in our life." In a recent video, Les Brown also declared: "Some people are so negative, if they walked into a dark-room they would develop themselves!"

"You need OQP in your life. OQP? Only. Quality. People"- Ed Decosta Executive Coach

As we evaluate our friends and associates-we may also ask ourselves: Which type of friend and associate are we? And... as we make the tough decisions as to who to include in our Inner Circle, we might ask: "Are we worth it?" And of course we would say to YOU... Smile friend... you have great worth and value. YES... you are worth it!

Your Friends and Fans,

Steve and Libba

Light Therapy Can Help With Bipolar Disorder

Affective mood disorders of various types and intensities are experiences by people all over the world. Some people experience mild types of mood disorders like SAD and SSAD (seasonal and subsyndromal seasonal affective disorders) while in a few cases, much more serious disorders like the Bi-polar disorder affect their lives in many negative ways for many years.

Bipolar Disorder

Bipolar affective disorder, also called bipolar affective disorder or manic depressive disorder. Those who suffer from this are prone to experiencing highly elevated moods at times (mania-manic) as well as severe depression (depression-depressive) states of mind during episodes, hence the term bipolar. There are also hypomanic episodes experienced by sufferers, which are characterized by excess energy and mild to moderate mania (observable in activity, speech and as generally high optimism). These two moods may alternate rapidly or be separated by periods where the sufferer behaves completely normally. The causes of this disorder are associated with both genetic and environmental factors. disorder afflicts more than 5 million Americans, 2 out of every hundred, in some form or severity, which is a cause for treatment through psychiatric help and / or medication. There are two main forms of the disorder, Bipolar 1 and bipolar 2.

Symptoms of Bipolar 1: One or more manic (elated) or mixed episodes occur in some sequence without the occurrence of a depressive episode.

Symptoms of Bipolar 2: In this type of disorder, hypomanic episodes occur rather than actual manic ones along with the occurrences of a major depressive episode.

Light therapy Treatment in relation to the sleep cycle

Along with the abnormal mood conditions, people with this disorder also suffer erratic sleep-wake cycles (Circadian rhythms). Studies have shown that regulating this sleep cycle using various forms of light therapy (as it is used for SAD - seasonal affective disorder patients) can not only improve sleep-wake conditions but also help normalize the mood in bipolar disorder patients a great deal.

In recent studies by the University Of Pittsburgh School Of Medicine's Western Psychiatric Institute, published in the journal of bipolar disorders, bright light therapy (which includes blue light treatment - which is highly effective for similar mood disorders) is effective is easing bipolar disorder (science daily), especially of the treatment sessions are up to 45 minutes long, conducted at mid-day (i.e. not in the morning or at night). Clinical studies showed that over 60 % of the people tested on this treatment with varying schedules responded to a positive extent, while out of the whole sample, at least half of the people tested responded fully to the treatment (science daily).

Light sources emitting 10000 lux blue or full spectrum light at a distance of 60cm, used for sessions either in the morning or mid-day (at whichever time the sufferer responds best to a treatment), and for sessions between thirty minutes to one hour in length are generally considered to be the best for treatment, causing a positive change within a week of treatment in many cases.

References:

Wikipedia[dot]com

www[dot]sciencedaily[dot]com/releases/2008/01/080103101121.htm

www[dot]ehow[dot]com/how_5266250_treat-bipolar-disorder-light-therapy.html

Chemical Sensitivity: New Cause For Depression?

Chemical intolerance is also called Multiple Chemical Sensitivity (MCS), sick building syndrome, toxic injury and other names. This has been a controversial topic within the medical community. There is no definitive diagnosis or treatment, leaving sufferers frustrated.

What Is It?

Chemical intolerance is a chronic condition involving a variety of symptoms after prolonged chemical exposure. Symptoms can be mild headache, rash or respiratory irritation. More severe forms include fatigue, seizures, immune system disorder, and many more. Because many of these symptoms resemble other illnesses, chemical sensitivity is often misdiagnosed. Since many suffering from chemical sensitivity also present symptoms of depression and anxiety, these patients are diagnosed and treated for these psychological disorders.

Research Evidence

Over the years, the medical community has been divided on the recognition of chemical intolerance as a true medical condition. Some believe it's a mere hypersensitivity to chemicals, other attribute it to psychological disorders. However, a recent research study may offer some redemption for the misunderstood. Annals of Family Medicine recently published a study that offered more insight into this controversial condition. The study was conducted in two busy family practice clinics in Texas. Out of 400 participants, over 20% actually suffered from chemical intolerance. This is more than sensitivity to chemicals. The sufferers also had co-morbidities such as allergies, depression, anxiety, alcoholism, etc. Overall, they are less functional than those without chemical sensitivity. They also visit doctors and emergency rooms more often for co-morbid conditions, thus incurs significantly higher medical cost.

Treatment

While there's no specific treatment for chemical sensitivity, certain lifestyle changes may help to improve or resolve symptoms. First of all, it's essential to identify and avoid the chemicals that are causing symptoms. These will be different for each individual and sometimes it's a process of elimination before identifying the culprit(s). Secondly, reducing or eliminating caffeine and alcohol in one's diet may help to reduce the severity and frequency of symptoms. Third of all, certain medications could trigger side effects similar to chemical sensitivity symptoms. Be sure to discuss your medications with your physician to avoid unpleasant side effects or interactions.

Implications

The above study may be the first step in validating chemical sensitivity as a true medical condition. Currently the illness isn't recognized by major healthcare organizations because of limited evidence. As researchers gain more insights into the illness, then perhaps more effective and targeted treatments will be available to alleviate symptoms.

The new information also proves that environmental chemicals do, indeed, affect our health. And it's happening more often than we recognize. If one fifth of those who visit a primary care physicians office are intolerant to chemicals, then a significant percentage of the population suffer from the condition also. This should be a wake-up call to those turning a blind eye to chemical over-usage. In modern society, people routinely encounter hundreds of chemicals in personal use products, furniture, cleaning products, office supplies, construction, etc. Many of these chemicals are known to be toxic to human and environmental health. Some are carcinogenic. Many have not been tested thoroughly. It shouldn't be a surprise to see evidence of how chronic exposure to these chemicals affects our health. It should prompt people to take action against chemical usage and opt for more natural products.

Conclusion

Chemical intolerance or sensitivity may be more often than previously thought. The medical community long believed that symptoms from the condition are caused by psychosocial factors. As new research evidence shine light on the prevalence of chemical sensitivity, we hope to see more actions in terms of medical treatment and reimbursement as well as environmental changes to prevent future occurrence.

Things To Do When You're Depressed

There are some basic things to do when your depressed that can really help deal with common depression that many people face each day. Assuming that you're not dealing with clinical depression or another type of depression that demands medical or mental health attention, making some simple choices to add certain things to your life, when you become blue or down feeling, can really help to lift depression and minimize its grip on your psyche. Gathering strength of will to make some lifestyle changes may be the single more difficult thing to do. However, if you decide to take action regarding things to do when your depressed, you will be surprised at how you actually feel almost immediately.

Many people experience some form of depression at some point or other in their lives, whether due to a minor personal setback or serious personal loss. While some people should seek mental health attention if they experience deep depression for over two weeks, many can deal with common depression by making some good personal choices. The only extra help you may really need is some support from friends or family, who encourage you or provide accountability for your new choices. Here are some basic things to do when your depressed:

Exercise and Eat Well

Usually when someone is down or depressed, eating right and exercising are the last things they actually like doing. However, these two things may be the most important first things to do in beginning to lift the suffocating depression in your life. Make a choice to engage in moderate exercise at least 4 days a week for 20 minutes a day, more if possible. Also, plan a menu every week that includes healthy foods free from sugar, processed foods and caffeine. Fresh produce and lean meats like turkey and salmon are great for helping a person feel better.

Choose a New Activity

It's typical for people who feel depressed to withdraw from others, however, this is the time that you should choose to interact with others. Choosing a new hobby that involves other people is a great way to naturally socialize. Join a class, get involved in a sport or join a travel club. You'll be surprised at how this will lift your spirits.

Choose to Think of Others

Depressed people tend to stare at their own problems constantly and can lose touch with the bigger picture in life. Stepping outside of your personal issues and helping someone else can be an invigorating experience, not mention how it can affect another person. Make a point to offer a random act of kindness to someone you work with, a family member, a stranger or a friend. It can be as simple as a pat on the back, a card sent or taking a meal to your next door neighbor. Do something intentional for at least one person, once a day for a solid month. You will find that your despondency will begin to lift, while making these choices about things to do when your depressed.

Chronic Anxiety Disorder - There is Hope

Anyone who wakes each day with a cloud of anxiousness hanging over them and experiences recurring symptom episodes can be classified with a chronic anxiety disorder. This is assuming they are not taking medications that might relieve some of the outbreaks. If a person has this chronic situation, is there any hope of a solution?

Mental health is both fascinating and puzzling due to the many variables that prevent actual working models. No two people are exactly alike in education, perceptions, morals, or anything else. The scientific community has tried valiantly to explain why people act and react as they do. However, the more that is learned, the more that presents itself to be researched.

Chronic victims are similar only in their symptoms. By the nature of their suffering, many must take medications that usually cause varying side effects among patients. This makes it harder for a therapist to get a victim to a comfort zone and abate some of the problems.

People with anxieties who have longer periods between episodes can be treated differently than chronic sufferers. Therapy alone might be all that is needed to put the irregular victim on the road to recovery. Victories for chronic anxiety victims start with getting through the day without an attack and incrementally getting better over time. At anytime during the progress, a setback can easily place the process back at square one.

Situations in life affect the regularity of chronic disorders. Abraham Lincoln was believed to have suffered from clinical depression, but others think it was chronic anxiety. His wife Mary was considered bi-polar and was eventually submitted to a mental health facility, due in part to anxiety brought on by the loss of her husband and three children.

Winston Churchill was also a great leader who has been linked to both bi-polar and manic depression disorders. Some historians claim that these factors actually made him a better leader, because a better-grounded leader might have given up when the odds seemed stacked against England during the war.

Other noteworthy people who have experienced chronic depression or disorders closely akin are Princess Diana, Burt Reynolds, John Candy, Winona Ryder, Carly Simon, and Nicole Kidman. Michael Jackson was also diagnosed with anxiety disorder before his death. This only shows that anyone may fall in the snare of mental disorders given the right circumstances.

Over the years, many of the most talented and influential people have suffered from occasional to chronic anxiety disorder. The old terminology of 'dysfunctional' is not an accurate assessment of a person who suffers from anxiety. People with issues can still lead productive lives, and sometimes the anxiety may heighten some creative or intelligent parts of the mind.

Steps To Follow Before And After HIV Tests

Undergoing an HIV test can be quite an overwhelming experience for many people. Owing to the social stigma associated with this disease, undergoing a test is an emotionally disturbing experience. Depending on their mental strengths and confidence levels, people can experience a wide range of emotions such as depression, frustration, fear, anger, hopelessness, despair, panic or even plain denial to accept the truth about their status.

Therefore, just before the test is conducted, the person must be given psychological counseling, also referred to as 'Pre-Test Counseling' to strengthen him or her from within and enable him or her to face the test with full confidence, irrespective of what the result may be.

The pre-test counseling is very important to control the emotional trauma and the fear of the impending dangers and consequences associated with the positive result of a test.

If the person is found to be HIV negative, then the person can be sent away after advising him some prevention measures for the future. However, if the person is found to be HIV positive, then the person should be told about this only after another round of psychological counseling, referred to as 'Post-Test Counseling'.

The objective of post-test counseling is to ease the worry and tension in the patient's mind and to support him or her emotionally when their status is disclosed to them. The counseling is necessary to prevent suicidal tendency in the patient and to keep his emotions in control. The counselor should project the situation in a positive light and emphasize that it is actually good that the patient has learnt about his or her positive status early because this will make treatment easier and enable him or her to handle the future complications associated with this disease better. The counselor should also help the individual regain his confidence, infuse a determination to live his remaining life better.

Short Quotes Help the People Who Lost Their Beloved

Everyone in the world searches for love and care, but there are many love stories where couples do get their partners and get separate from each others. We fall in love and dream of spending life with him/her, but it is not necessary that we get our loved once. There may be family problems or your beloved may change the mind. This is time when you cry a lot and want stay alone. Short quotes are very helpful at that bad time. When life seems like dead end then these inspirational sayings helps you to forget what has happened. Losing your loved one is the most horrible experience ever comes in life and its after effects are:

- Lovers become very sad and hopeless.
- You do not feel any interest in life.
- Both of you want to go somewhere out and start ignoring each others.
- You do not care for your health.
- Always think about old memories.
- Do no sleep and keeps on crying.

So if you are going through same feelings than dear you must need to care about your life, one wrong step can spoil your whole life. Here you can take help of short quotes to come out from that depression and motivate yourself to re-start the life once again. They teach you that whatever happens in life, happens for a reason. One should live life practically, there may be some very good options are waiting for you. These inspirational sayings become the ray of hope and capable to stop the tear of sad person. I feel that we should never give up living life in any circumstances. We need to understand the situation first, than go forward. May be that person is not made for you. Do not play with your life and reading something good written by experienced people work like a miracle for you.

I would like to share one of the best quotation for this situation: "There is no market for your sorrows, so never advertise your feelings, just display your attitude." We get the power to bounce back from short quotes and find a new reason to start our life. The message from short quotes for handling this kind situation are:

1 Divert your mind and keep yourself busy.
2 Take part in extra activities like games and sports.
3 Take care of your health, do some work out and try to make more friends.
4 Calm down yourself by believing what happened, happened for your benefit.
5 Be practical and try to forget the bad experience.

It is only you who is going to suffer by doing this, no one else will get affected.

The Top 50 Inspirational Movies

This is my list of the movies that inspire me the most. I am a movieholic and hope you guys find inspiration from this list. Enjoy the show

1. PURSUIT OF HAPPYNESS- A rages to riches story about a man who goes for his dreams and wont let his circumstances get in the way

2. Remember The Titans- In the 1970S a black and white high school are closed down and blacks and whites are mixed together. Through all the racial tension a black coach is chosen to head the newly segregated football team

3. FOREST GUMP- The story of a man with a low IQ who rose above his challenges, and proved that determination, courage, and love are more important than intellectual ability

4. THE COLOR PURPLE-Its based on the life and trials and tribulations of an African American woman in the early 1900's

5. RUDY: A big football fan who always had the dream to play for the Notre Dame football team. He is told he is too small for the game but he perseveres on

6. ALI-Based on the true story of great boxing champion Muhammad Ali

7. LIFE IS BEAUTIFUL-It's the story of a funny and carefree Jewish man who uses his comic talent to protect his son from the realities of Nazi occupation

8. BRAVEHEART-Story of William Wallace a peasant who unites the 13th Century Scottish in their battle to overthrow the English rule.

9. ERIN BROKONVICH- About an unemployed single mother who becomes a legal assistant and almost on her own brings down a California power company accused of polluting a city's water supply.

10. THE SHAWSHANK REDEMPTION- Two men in prison bond over a number of years, they find eventual redemption through acts of decency.

11. REDEMPTION: The Stan Tookie Williams Story- About the founder of the street gang the crepes and how in prison he found redemption. On death row he is able to find redemption

12. THE HURRICANE- The story of a talented boxer who is wrongly convicted of murder and his fight for his innocence

13. Billy Elliot- A young boy decides to become a ballet dancer and he gets some resistance from his family. He faces many trials as well triumphs as he perseveres to change his family's narrow minded set ways, inner conflict, and standing on his own feet

14. A BEAUTIFUL MIND-A bio of the rise of John Forbes Nash Jr., a math genius able to solve problems that baffled the greatest of minds. And how he was able to overcame years of suffering from schizophrenia to win the Nobel Prize in 1994

15. GANDHI-True story about Mohandas Gandhi a prominent Indian leader

16. Chariots Of Fire-About athletes who compete in the Summer Olympics about their perseverance and triumph.

17. PHILADELPHIA- Is a movie dealing with HIV/AIDS and homosexuality and it highlights the homophobic and stigma of the two

18. FRIED GREEN TOMATOES- Its a recollection movie where an older lady recalls the story of two women their trials and tribulations and lifelong friendship

19. RAIN MAN- About a selfish man who finds out his father left his millions of dollars to an older brother he didn't even know existed

20. THE NOTEBOOK- A beautiful love story which lasts decades

21. TITANIC- Is a movie set on the ill fated Titanic ship and its about a love story that develops on the ship

22. SEA BISCUIT- True story of the undersized Depression-era racehorse whose victories lifted not only the spirits of the team behind it but also those of their nation

23. RAY-True life story of Ray Charles and his amazing story of overcoming the impossible

24. PAY IT FORWARD- About the miraculous story of how a young boy changes the lives of many people through the simple act of good deeds

25. THE BUCKET LIST- About two old timers who decide to do all the things they have always wanted to do before they die of their terminal illnesses

26. MILK- About the life of Harvey Milk the first openly gay man elected to public office in America in the 70s. It is about his impact on the gay rights movement. One of the best movies I have ever seen.

27. Coach Carter- A basketball coach at a high school works hard to change the bad attitudes of his students.

28. RADIO- About a shy mentally challenged man who inspires a community

29. FREEDOM WRITERS- About a teacher who teachers rough inner city kids who fights to make a difference in the students lives and set them on a better path

30. NORMA REA- About a mill worker in a southern textile company who stands up for the better working conditions of her workers and herself.

31. THE DIARY OF ANNE FRANK- Based on the life of Anne Frank who hides from the NAZI during the invasion

32. GLORY : The story of the first company of black soldiers in the American civil war

33. LIFE SUPPORT- the story of a mother with AIDS who overcomes crack addiction becomes an AIDS activist in her community

34. BABE- A pig which is raised by sheep dogs learns how to herd sheep

35. WHATS LOVE GOT TO DO WITH IT- The amazing life story of the great entertainer Tina Turner and the amazing obstacles that she overcame

36. HOTEL RWANDA- The true life story of a man who sheltered thousands of Rwandans during the Rwandan genocide from danger and death

37. G1 JANE- Is about the first woman in allowed in the navy seals and huge obstacles in her way

38. TO KILL A MOCKINGBIRD- Based in racially torn 1939 Alabama and its about the hearing of a black man accused of raping a white woman

39. GLORY ROAD- Is based on the true story of the first all black basketball line-up for the 1966 NCAA national basketball championship title

40. SARAFINA- About the Soweto youth riots against apartheid in South Africa

41. AMISTAD- Is about an 1839 mutiny of slaves on a slave ship

42. SLUMDOG MILLIONAIRE- The story of a slum kid who grows up and plays the Indian version of Who wants to be a Millionaire

43. AMERICAN HISTORY X- A reformed Neo-Nazi comes out of prison and tries to stop his younger brother going the same path he did

44. THE PIANIST- A pianist tries to survive the Nazi invasion

45. SCHINDLERS LIST- Based on the true story of the business man Oscar Schindler who saves thousands of Jews from the Nazi machine during world war 2

46. BOYS DON'T CRY- A story about the courage to be who you truly are in the midst of horrible opposition

47. CHOCOLAT- About a mother and daughter who move into a conservative narrow minded French town in 1960 and shake things up

48. MALCOLM X- The true life story of Malcolm X an influential black human rights activist

49. OLIVER TWIST- Based on Charles Dickens movie about a young orphan boy and the troubles he finds as he tries to survive in a harsh world

50. THE JESSE OWENS STORY- The true story about Jesse Owens the African American athlete who proved Hitler wrong about the Aryan physical superiority

I love these movies. If you have not seen some of them check them out you have nothing to lose. To your life!

How to Overcome Depression? First Figure Out the Cause!

Pain and depression are the two sides of the same coin. You can only sympathize with the condition but can never feel it. It is quite difficult to judge whether it was a painful situation that led to the whole state of depression or was it the state of depression that is causing all the pain. One would be surprised to check out the statistics, that there are about 75% of the populations who suffer from depression. Depression is a state of mind that can happen due to certain incident in life or it may be a syndrome since birth. Sometimes it gets a little difficult to find out the different symptoms of pain or depression and treatment of one could lead to identifying the symptoms of the other. But the most important question that still needs to be answered is how to overcome depression.

If you want to know how to get over depression it is very important that you find out what are the causes that led to depression in the first place. There are several reasons why people suffer from depression. Some of which is abuse, like physical or sexual assault might lead to depression. Certain medications might develop depression as a side effect. Depression may also happen from regular conflicts between your partner or family members. A sudden loss or death in family may also lead to depression. Again, certain major events in life can also lead to depression like divorce or getting married. The event doesn't always have to be anything very different, it might also be very general like the ones mentioned. Sometimes some serious illness also results in depression. Suppose you are infected by a particular illness which made you lose a year or got a limb of your body amputated. Such things sow the seed of depression. Apart from these regular causes there is one very serious cause of depression, which is genetic. If there is a family history of depression in every generation, then it is a possibility that your children might have it as well.

When you realize these causes it will become easier for you to deal, treat and figure out how to overcome depression. There are both medications and therapies to overcome depression. There are many rehabilitation centers as well who specialize in depression treatment. Though there are medications for treating depression, but majority of times the patients get addicted to these drugs and are unable to live without them. Whenever they think of leaving the medicines the withdrawal syndromes get so severe that they have to fall back on the medications. Some of the withdrawal syndromes are sweating, unconsciousness, headache and mood swings etc. The patient is unable to behave properly; he has absolutely no control over his temper. Shows a lot of lethargy and generally has lack of confidence. But there are certain very effective therapies that help to overcome depression. The rehabilitation center does a very good job in this department and in the most cases the patient has come out clean.

Bipolar Disorder 101- What You Absolutely Need to Know

Introduction

Bipolar disorder, also known as manic-depressive illness, is quite prevalent in USA and the numbers are on a rise with the stressors of life on a rise.

What is bipolar disorder?

Bipolar disorder is a mental illness in whish one faces unpredictable mood swings ranging from depressive symptoms to manic symptoms. It is not necessary that a person has depression to be labeled as bipolar disorder, episodes of mania are sufficient. The most frequent age of onset is between 20 and 30 years but the variations are still present.

What are different types?

There are basically two different types of bipolar disorder type I or type II based on the amount of depressive and manic episodes. For characterizing a person as full-blown mania one should have the symptoms of mania for one week and of depression for two weeks.

How to diagnose Bipolar disorder?

To diagnose bipolar disorder one should have symptoms of mania or symptoms of mania and depression. The symptoms of mania are unrestrained buying sprees, talkativeness, inflated self-esteem, flight of ideas, sleeplessness, distractibility, etc.

To diagnose depression the symptoms are recurrent thoughts of death, insomnia, loss of energy, weight loss, psychomotor agitation, markedly diminished interest, etc.

What are differential diagnoses?

The differential diagnoses are hyperthyroidism, AIDS, Huntington's, Wilson's disease, alcohol abuse, etc.

What is the cause?

The cause is not very well understood but it is hypothesized that patients are genetically predisposed. Some give the theory of deficiency of some chemical transmitters. Others give the theory of neurostructural changes.

What is the management?

According to the physicians it is a disorder in which the patient comes to the physician by himself for his problems. For treating the bipolar disorders the treatment options available are lithium, carbamazepine (Tegretol) and valproic acid (Depakote). The side effects of using lithium are fine tremor, hypothyroidism, and neutrophilia besides others. The main problem with lithium is that its blood level should be monitored. Also the effects of it wont appear until 7-10 days of treatment. Carbamazepine has the side effects of rashes, hyponatremia, agranulocytosis, etc. Valproic acid has the adverse effects of tremors, pancreatitis, liver problems, etc.
Besides the medications there are certain other treatment modalities available such as cognitive behavior therapy, yoga therapy and herbal medicines. Through the cognitive behavior therapy the subjects learn to change the negative thoughts. Yoga therapy, thing primarily of the east but now gaining good ground in the west, aims at channelising positive energy throughout the body. As these therapies are not inducing certain chemicals into the body, they are said to be without any side effects.

What are the precautions?

Because of the side effects profile of all the drugs and way the patients behave, the physicians should be extra alert. It is said that the most important time to look after the patient is when he is recovering because it is the time when he is getting energy and hence he can fulfill his thoughts of suicide.

Depression and Chronic Back Pain - Symptoms, Diagnosis and Treatment

Depression is by far the most common emotion associated with chronic back pain. The type of depression that often accompanies chronic pain is referred to as major depression or clinical depression. This type of depression goes beyond what would be considered normal sadness or feeling "down for a few days". The symptoms of a major depression occur daily for at least two weeks and include at least 5 of the following (DSM-IV, 1994):

• A mood that is depressed, sad, hopeless, low, or irritable, which can include periodic crying spells
  
  


• Sleep problems of either too much (hypersomnia) or too little (hyposomnia) sleep
  
  


• Poor appetite or significant weight loss or increased appetite or weight gain
  
  


• Feeling agitated, restless or sluggish (low energy or fatigue)
  
  


• Decreased sex drive
  
  


• Loss of interest or pleasure in usual activities
  
  


• Feeling of worthlessness and/or guilt
  
  


• Problems with concentration or memory
  
  


• Thoughts of death, suicide, or wishing to be dead
  
  

Chronic pain and depression are two of the most common health problems that family physicians, spine specialists and mental health professionals encounter, yet relatively few studies have investigated the relationship between these conditions in the general population (Currie and Wang, 2004).

Major depression is thought to be up to four times greater in people with chronic back pain than in the general population (Sullivan, Reesor, Mikail & Fisher, 1992). Studies on depression in chronic low back pain patients show that the prevalence is even higher.

Depression is common for those with chronic back pain

Depression is more commonly seen in patients with chronic back pain problems than in patients with pain that is of an acute, short-term nature. How does depression develop in these cases? This can be understood by looking at the host of symptoms often experienced by the person with chronic back pain or other spine-related pain.

The pain often makes it difficult to sleep, leading to fatigue and irritability during the day.

Then, during the day, because patients with back pain have difficulty with most movement they often move slowly and carefully, spending most of their time at home away from others. This leads to social isolation and a lack of enjoyable activities.

Due to the inability to work, there may also be financial difficulties that begin to impact the entire family.

Beyond the pain itself, there may be gastrointestinal distress caused by anti-inflammatory medication and a general feeling of mental dullness from the pain medications.

The pain is distracting, leading to memory and concentration difficulties.

Sexual activity is often the last thing on the person's mind and this causes more stress in the patient's relationships.

Understandably, these symptoms accompanying chronic back pain or neck pain may lead to feelings of despair, hopelessness and other symptoms of a major depression or clinical depression.

A recent study by Strunin and Boden (2004) investigated the family consequences of chronic back pain. Patients reported a wide range of limitations on family and social roles including: physical limitation that hampered patients' ability to do household chores, take care of the children, and engage in leisure activities with their spouses. Spouses and children often took over family responsibilities once carried out by the individual with back pain. These changes in the family often led to depression and anger among the back pain patients and to stress and strain in family relationships.

Psychological theories about depression

Several psychological theories about the development of depression in chronic back pain patients focus on the issue of control. As discussed previously, chronic back pain can lead to a diminished ability to engage in a variety of activities such as work, recreational pursuits, and interaction with family members and friends. This situation leads to a downward physical and emotional spiral that has been termed "physical and mental deconditioning" (See Gatchel and Turk, 1999). As the spiral continues, the person with chronic back pain feels more and more loss of control over his or her life. The individual ultimately feels totally controlled by the pain, leading to major depression. Once in this depressed state, the person is generally unable to change the situation even if possible solutions to the situation exist.

How L-Glutamine Increases Memory And Cognitive Functions!

If you are one of the many individuals that suffer from brain fogginess, fatigue and even lethargy, you can find the relief you need because L-Glutamine improves memory and cognitive functions. This amino acid is very prevalent in some parts of the brain, the spinal cord, and even organs of digestion and detoxification. These processes all work synergistically with each other to produce optimal health conditions that leave you feeling great at all times. If you have ever struggled to remember certain events, information, or critical details, you need to modify the way your brain comprehends information, which can be effectively accomplished when you use L-Glutamine to enhance memory function. This powerful antioxidant does it all, and revitalizes your cells so you benefit from enhanced energy levels for your health and anti-aging needs.

How the medicinal use of L-Glutamine improves your memory

Now you can experience all the thrills of being able to remember again when you utilize this natural alternative health supplement for total body strength and endurance. This active amino acid works through protein synthesis and chemical conversions in different parts of the body which stimulate healthy reactions to occur. Empowering your mind from the cellular level up, L-Glutamine improves memory and removes accumulations of ammonia and nitrogen in the blood which ultimately affects the functioning of your brain. Ammonia is present when this ingredient is converted into glutamic acid which requires certain amounts of ammonia. When you normalize these levels, the brain fogginess disappears as your cells receive proper amounts of oxygen and nutrients for healthy functioning.

Health advantages of using L-Glutamine to enhance memory function

Additionally, there are other healthy incentives to use this ingredient as well. When this beneficial substance is converted into its anti-oxidizing form, it enhances the productivity of the central nervous system, starting at the brain. It can also protect your nerves from damage due to hormones, chemicals, and intense electrical signals. When you use L-Glutamine to enhance memory function, you are also decreasing the risks of suffering from anxiety, depression, and many of its related symptoms because of its anti-depressant qualities. This alternative health supplement influences the pituitary gland to release certain chemicals, signals, and hormones throughout the body to balance out physiological functions.

Clinical tests performed on L-Glutamine to improve your memory

There have been numerous clinical tests performed on the efficacy of this organic ingredient. It is the most abundant amino acid of the body providing rich nutritional value as well as abilities to heal cellular injury. This key component triggers the growth of cells through modified metabolic activities so you can recharge your mind one step at a time. Clinical trials based on how L-Glutamine improves memory function indicate that patients experienced improved moods, emotional states, and did not suffer from inhibited cognitive functions after its consecutive use. This is a non-toxic way to reach your goals of mental health without causing harm to the rest of the body.

Our tips on getting the most from L-Glutamine to improve memory function

Now you can behold the power of a substance that reverses the effects of aging in your mind because of how L-Glutamine improves memory function. This is by far one of the first senses of your body that decreases with age. When you combine its use with other natural vitamins, minerals, and key ingredients, your brains functions are normalized and strengthened as it binds with existing substances and tissues. Your neurotransmitters will be the first targeted cells that benefit from the medicinal use of this substance, which everyone knows is what causes depression and improved cognitive functions! Now you can feel your best and remember information for long amounts of time when you this ingredient for whole body health and anti-aging needs.

How to Deal With Depression and Anxiety in Your Work

Dealing with depression and anxiety in your work is not easy. The very first thing one should do to deal it depression is to get a professional help. Often times, a lot of companies recently are offering numerous programs and activities for their employees. It is always advisable to contact and be in touch with Human Resources Representative confidentially and ask offer such programs. If in any case your company does not have any program to offer then you may want to ask your physician or the nearest mental health institution.

Evaluate the root of your anxiety through the help of a doctor or professional. Discovering the cause or causes of your depression could take a while but once you know the cause, it will be a bit easy to figure out and deal with your depression.

Being positive in many aspect of your life is one way to battle and win over depression. Challenge fearful and anxious thoughts with positive statements. Minimize fear behind by thinking something constructive.

People then to exaggerate assumptions most of the time when they worry. And most of the time they worry more by exaggerating things. Always remember to collect all the facts of current situations. Gathering all the facts, this way you can distinguish reality from what is not. Always remember to never assume anything.

As the old saying goes, take one thing at the time. Never worry for tomorrow, for tomorrow will take care for itself.

Do not hesitate to get and ask help from a councilor and do not give up in finding solutions that will eventually get rid of your depression. Remember there is always hope and you will eventually get better if you will be persistent in dealing with your depression.

Guilt - Mankind's Dual Nature is to Sin and Then Feel Bad About It

We all struggle with guilt and sin. Not just some of us, all of us. It is our nature.

The Bible talks about our sinful nature, but what does that mean?

Basically, we are born with a preference to sin because our predecessors, Adam and Eve, messed up by eating the forbidden fruit. They didn't mean to do it anymore than we mean to sin. And, yet they did it and so do we.

If you carefully read and reread Romans chapter 7 in the Bible it explains this phenomena. But, it also makes most people say, 'what?' because it is so difficult to explain or understand. So I'm going to try to say it more plainly because it's important that we understand why we sin like there's no tomorrow. And, we all know there is.

Sin by the Bible's definition is doing something that leads to death. We all know that eventually we will all die, but you can die while still alive if your spirit is broken or destroyed by depression, pain, sickness, hardship, abuse, isolation or the death of loved ones. Humans are not immortal and no matter how good you are, you will eventually die physically. Mother Teresa died. Pope John Paul II died. We all die.

We are considered "alive" only when we are totally and completely without sin. Nuns, priests, ministers, pastors and other highly religious people are not alive anymore than you are. Why?

Because you cannot be "alive" as long as the body you currently possess is still physically alive. The body contains the sinful nature whether you are a Christian or not. The mind or spirit is a different matter. We all start out with a sinful mind. Our thoughts make us do things we want to resist but for some reason can't.

Once you become a Christian you are given a spirit helper (Holy Spirit) who now resides in your mind but so does that stupid sinful nature. Unfortunately, it doesn't go away when you become a Christian. This is when the dual nature part kicks in.

Once saved, we don't want to think bad thoughts about the driver in front of us who can't go faster than a snail, but we do. We know those thoughts are sinful but now we feel a pang of guilt. We are suppose to love everyone without regard to their actions, but some people make it really hard. We know what is right, think the bad thought, feel the guilt, wish we could stop feeling the guilt and vow to do better next time. Then another driver pulls out going even slower than the last one. Arrrrg, your sinful mind screams. Ah-hem, the spirit mind reminds. And we cycle through right, wrong, guilt, remorse, and promise of better next time.

Does it ever end?

No. I'm afraid it doesn't. But it does get easier to listen to the Holy Spirit instead of the Enemy (the devil). And, just like a muscle, the more you use your spirit mind and ignore the sinful mind, the stronger the spirit grows until it can easily overshadow the sinful nature.

Jesus promises our suffering on earth will end after we die and that we get to join him in heaven for eternity. Once the sinful body is gone, the sinful mind goes with it. Only the spirit mind remains and it can transcend the physical realm. We are only finally free of our sinful nature after our physical body dies.

You may be contemplating taking your own life to end your suffering, thinking I just gave you the perfect solution. Think again.

The Holy Spirit will never lead you to take your own life. Never. So if your sinful mind is strong enough to convince you to commit suicide, you will not transcend suffering in the afterlife, you will get to suffer even more and this time for an eternity. Do the math: 80 years of suffering now vs. an eternity of suffering later. Even if every day of your life sucks and is horrendous, it is but a tiny span of time compared to forever! In Save Yourself! The Plain Truth, I explain how you can tap into the Holy Spirit by accepting salvation. Salvation makes suffering here on earth much more bearable and guarantees an eternity filled with good things (love, joy, peace, etc.), and no bad.

Sin only becomes sin once you know what sin is. Sin is not sin if you don't know anything about it or aren't capable of understanding it. This why animals cannot be sinners even when they kill, which we all know is one of the biggest sins you can commit. Animals don't have the capacity (or the vocabulary) to understand sin is the willful disobedience of God's commands. The mentally challenged, very young children and indigenous people with no contact with the outside world are also exempt from the sinful nature.

Does that mean if you don't believe in God, you don't have a sinful nature?

No. It's the lack of knowledge about right and wrong (God's commandments) that exempts you from that sinful nature. God has uniquely equipped humans who live in isolation to believe in a higher spirit being without "knowing" about sin. Anthropologists who study isolated cultures have found they have a natural reverence for nature, food sources, water and each other. They kill only to eat or when threatened, just like animals. Most of these cultures lack sins that modern cultures have, such as coveting material things -- they share naturally to preserve the whole community -- or lying -- they live so closely to each other they have nothing to hide. They are "innocent" of sins.

The awareness of sin brings shame. That is why Adam and Eve hid and covered their nakedness from God after they had sinned. Before sin they had no reason to be ashamed. Unfortunately, the awareness of sin made Adam and Eve, and most of us, more likely to engage in sinful behavior. We seemed to be wired to be willful and to disobey when someone tells us not to do something. The Bible even says that we will struggle with this.

We are filled with shame when we do bad things even when we don't want to. It's the sin acting, not us. But we have the choice to listen to the Holy Spirit rather than our sinful nature. Nobody said it was going to be easy but the rewards are greater.

The Bible says the sinful mind brings constant thoughts of death, while the spirit filled mind brings abundant life and everlasting peace.

You know you are using your sinful mind, rather than your spirit filled mind, when you consider anything that would lead to death -- yours or someone else's:

• Taking your own life to stop your suffering


• Getting even or settling a score by hurting someone else


• Purposefully driving in a manner that endangers others


• Physically harming yourself or someone to get them to do what you want


• Physically harming yourself or someone to teach them a lesson


• Using children, the elderly, women or any other "weaker" person for inappropriate sexual purposes


• Taking or using alcohol, illegal or prescription drugs in a manner that impairs you physically, emotionally, mentally or spiritually


• Abusing any substance that could lead to your diminished health or well-being -- tobacco, alcohol, diuretics, stimulants, depressants, or fatty, sugary, preservative-laden foods to excess


• Participating in "jackass" type behavior -- dangerous stunts or risky activities like skateboarding behind moving vehicles, jumping from rooftops, etc.


• Ignoring life threatening diseases and illnesses or refusing to seek medical attention for yourself or others


• Harming, torturing or killing animals for fun or any other reason except as a food source


• Any other activity, behavior or action that endangers yourself, others or nature (animals, the environment)


• Any obsessive thoughts that would lead you to consider any of the aforementioned things

It's tricky to understand how you can be "alive" while you are "dead" in sin. The only way to feel "alive" is to ask for salvation through Jesus Christ. Salvation begins with a simple prayer (explained in my book, Save Yourself! The Plain Truth) and ends with a new life where you feel more alive and at peace than you ever thought possible. This is what it really means to be born again. You get to start fresh.

EQ - Emotional Intelligence Quota And Success

We all want to be successful. Many of us set goals around becoming great, successful leaders.We are all looking for the steps, strategies and or formulas that fit us best. The industry is filled with authors, speakers, coaches and other professionals that speak of secrets to success. Not to mention the tapes audio and Internet resources available. Success in the business and the world globally looks to a new and different type of leadership. Leadership that blends knowledge (IQ) with Emotional Intelligence Quota (EQ)

Daniel Goleman is a leader in the field of EQ. I have studied and written research papers supporting Goldman's EQ concept. I believe in it. I use it in my classroom and coaching. My clients-student and adults alike especially my clients in the business world globally have made positive transforms and reached new levels of success by incorporating Emotional Intelligence Training into their Coaching.

Daniel Goleman brilliantly states the concept in his book Primal Leadership "Great leaders move us. They ignite our passion and inspire the best in us. When we try to explain why they are so effective, we speak of strategy, vision, or powerful ideas. But the reality is much more primal: Great leadership works through the emotions. No matter what leaders set out to do--whether it's creating strategy or mobilizing teams to action--their success depends on how they do it.

Even if they get everything else just right, if leaders fail in this primal task of driving emotions in the right direction, nothing they do will work as well as it could or should. That's a very powerful but true statement. Research supports Goleman's work and EQ philosophy.
What is Emotional Intelligence or EQ?

The term EQ encompasses the following five characteristics and abilities:

1.Self-awareness--knowing your emotions, recognizing feelings as they occur, and discriminating between them

2.Mood management--handling feelings so they are relevant to the current situation and you react appropriately

3.Self-motivation--"gathering up" your feelings and directing yourself towards a goal, despite self-doubt, inertia, and impulsiveness

4.Empathy--recognizing feelings in others and tuning into their verbal and nonverbal cues

5.Managing relationships--handling interpersonal interaction, conflict resolution, and negotiations
Why do we need Emotional Intelligence?

Research in brain-based learning suggests that emotional health is fundamental to effective learning. According to a report from the National Center for Clinical Infant Programs, the most critical element for a student's success in school is an understanding of how to learn from "Emotional Intelligence" by Daniel Goleman. The key ingredients for this understanding are:

Confidence

Curiosity

Intentionality

Self-control

Relatedness

Capacity to communicate

Ability to cooperate

These traits are all aspects of Emotional Intelligence. Traits that are key in personal and professional development and becoming successful. Basically, a student who learns to learn is much more apt to succeed. Emotional Intelligence has proven a better predictor of future success than traditional methods like the GPA, IQ, and standardized test scores.

In recent years, the great interest in Emotional Intelligence on the part of corporations, universities, and schools nationwide. The idea of Emotional Intelligence has inspired research and curriculum development throughout these facilities to improve educational curriculum and incorporate these principles into every day learning for students. I became very interested in Goleman's work back in 2000.along with the work of Howard Gardner and his Theory of "Multiple Intelligence" as a tool for providing success. Which I will discuss later in this article.

Building one's Emotional Intelligence has a lifelong impact. Many parents and educators, alarmed by increasing levels of conflict in young schoolchildren--from low self-esteem to early drug and alcohol use to depression, are rushing to teach students the skills necessary for Emotional Intelligence. And in corporations, the inclusion of Emotional Intelligence in training programs has helped employees cooperate better and motivate more, thereby increasing productivity and profits, Researchers have concluded that people who manage their own feelings well and deal effectively with others are more likely to live content lives. Plus, happy people are more apt to retain information and do so more effectively than dissatisfied people.

As you can see EQ is more than a smile and an encouraging word, its a set of abilities that distinguish star performers from average leaders, the absence of which derails careers. As stated by Daniel Goleman in his book Emotional Intelligence and Primal Leadership, and The Center for Creative Leadership. The good news is that unlike IQ, your emotional intelligence, or EQ, can be developed.

What's the payoff for EQ Training?

There are many leadership training programs where you can learn the strategies and tactics of leaders or "What to do" There are fewer where you can learn "How to be!

Will you be more effective as a leader if you develop excellent interpersonal skills by developing your EQ?

Of course, But the big payoff comes from your ability to use EQ to unlock, discover and liberate the most authentically powerful and creative leader within you! In today's world successful leaders know how to sense, understand and use emotions to improve decision making, performance and overall quality of life.

What are some of the organizations that use EQ?

Many organizations like Allstate Insurance, All-American Homes, Blue Cross/Blue Shield, Eli Lilly, Northrop Aviation, Social Security Administration, US Dept of Labor, the US Postal Service are providing EQ training to their employees with great success. Individuals in these organizations have increased their personal effectiveness by creating and taking part in productive working relationships.

Goleman hits the nail on the head in these quotes:

"IQ and technical skills are important, but emotional intelligence is the sine qua non of leadership. When I compared star performers with average ones in senior leadership positions, nearly 90% of the difference in their profiles was attributable to emotional intelligence factors rather than cognitive abilities." Daniel Goleman

"Emotional Intelligence is a master aptitude, a capacity that profoundly affects all other abilities"- ."Daniel Goleman

What is Multiple Intelligence and how does it affect my success?

The theory of multiple intelligences was developed in 1983 by Dr. Howard Gardner, professor of education at Harvard University. It suggests that the traditional notion of intelligence, based on I.Q. testing, is far too limited. Instead, Dr. Gardner proposes eight different intelligences to account for a broader range of human potential in children and adults. These intelligences are

o Linguistic intelligence ("word smart")

o Logical-mathematical intelligence ("number/reasoning smart")Logical

o Spatial intelligence ("picture smart")

o Bodily-Kinesthetic intelligence ("body smart")

o Musical intelligence ("music smart")

o Interpersonal intelligence ("people smart")

o Intrapersonal intelligence ("self smart")

o Naturalist intelligence ("nature smart")

The basic theory states we all have 8 intelligences. That's amazing! Some are stronger than others in us. We learn best through activities geared towards our MI strengths. I use the work of Goleman and Gardner in my classroom and in my Coaching practice. The results are amazing and life transforming. The success I see in my clients and students is nothing but positive. Combining EQ and MI provides individuals with a sense of "wholeness" that adds balance to their life and puts them on a road to success personally and professionally.
The learning that takes place using EQ and MI is "learning that is meaningful, necessary and lasts"

What implications does MI have for adults and career success?

The theory of multiple intelligences also has strong implications for adult learning and development. Many adults find themselves in jobs that do not make optimal use of their most highly developed intelligences (for example, the highly bodily-kinesthetic individual who is stuck in a linguistic or logical desk-job when he or she would be much happier in a job where they could move around, such as a recreational leader, or physical therapist). The theory of multiple intelligences gives adults a whole new way to look at their lives, examining potentials that they left behind in their childhood (such as a love for art or drama) but now have the opportunity to develop through courses, hobbies, or other programs of self-development.

Here are 3 actions steps to help you put these ideas into action

1. Evaluate your management style. Determine if EQ training or Coaching can improve your performance and afford you greater opportunities for success. If the answer is yes, contact me carolgcoach@aol.coom for a complimentary session to discuss your options.

2. Use the Multiple Intelligence Theory to help you decide the following

o Are you in a career that you are suited for

o Does your career bring out the best

o Are you reaching your full potential

o Can you honestly say you love what you do?.

If the answer is no to one, some or all of these. contact me for a complimentary session to discuss the possibilities for having a career you love and can succeed at. We all can have a life we love and want if we act on it!

3. Contact me to learn more about how Coaching can help you set meaningful goals to achieve the success you are looking for. carolgcoach@aol.com Sign up for a free consultation.

Haunted Psychiatric Institutions

There are many reasons why people may go see a psychiatrist: stress, anxiety, depression, seeing ghosts. Sadly for people that suffer from that last reason may not want to go to certain psychiatric institutions since they are haunted, it probably will escalate their current condition. Here are the top 4 haunted psychiatric facilities in the United States.

1) Athens Mental Health Center, Athens County Ohio. The mental health center is an old building on Ohio University's campus. This facility was home to the criminally insane and it is believed that the patients were tortured and beating by the hospital staff. In 1979 a female patient, Margaret Schilling disappeared, and the facility closed a year later. After the closing of the facility, her body was found in the attic of the hospital by a maintenance man. After removing the body and cleaning the area several times, there was a dark outline of her body with full details of her hair style and clothing. People can still see Schilling's outline, and have reported hearing her and other patients of the facility walking the halls.

2) Northern State Mental Hospital in Seattle Washington. The hospital was opened in 1912 and patients were able to participate to in the daily upkeep of the farms that were located on the property. There were several incidents of patients who died, or even killed each other while on the grounds, and there are at least 1,000 bodies that were buried on the premises. Many have seen a ghost that throws objects, experienced cold spots, and also a man who seems to be searching for a little girl.

3) The Waverly Hills Sanatorium in Louisville, Kentucky. The Sanatorium opened its doors in 1910 for tuberculosis patients, and could accommodate 40-50 patients, but the epidemic cause the facility to be inhabited by 140 people. For many, the only cure for their ailments was death itself. It has been believed over 6,000 people had died in the sanatorium, and then the facility was closed in 1962. There are rumors that in room 502 a female nurse hung herself because she had contracted tuberculosis and was also pregnant out of wedlock. There have been reports of people seeing orbs, electrical disturbances, full body apparitions, and disembodied voices. The hospital is considered to be the most haunted location with the most paranormal activity.

4) Danvers State Hospital in Danvers, Massachusetts. The construction of the building was completed in 1878 and was more than just a place for the mentally ill; it also had a program for training nurses. The facility was only supposed to house about 600 patients, but of course would become over crowded with more than 2,300 patients, which were supposed to be taken care of by about 9 people. Treatment for the mentally ill at the hospital included shock-therapy, lobotomies, and hydrotherapy. Due to decaying and unstable structure, most of the hospital was eventually torn down and replaced with luxury condos in 2007. Footsteps and apparitions have been sighted or heard on the property.

The Impact of ADHD

It is difficult to establish the impact of ADHD from a financial perspective since there are many segments of society which have benefitted from these creative, impulsive, high energy personalities who tend to be impatient and forgetful. A handful of examples would be special education teachers, pharmaceutical companies, mental health specialists, doctors, divorce lawyers, and job placement services.

On the other hand the impact of ADHD on those with attention deficit hyperactivity disorder is profound getting the short end of the stick when it comes to relationships and social interactions, earning power, and overall mental health and wellness.

The impact of ADHD - Generalization

We have all had those days when we can't find our keys, forget to charge our cell phones or other important electronic devices, make inappropriate comments at just the wrong time, and can't seem to get our schoolwork or job projects done on time. But for those with attention deficit hyperactivity disorder these days can be a regular occurrence rather than an isolated event.

Then there are those children or adults who may be borderline ADHD where their doctor doesn't quite find them ADHD enough to justify a diagnosis leaving them feeling bored, worthless, hopeless, and seemingly always being one step behind their peers without any hope of professional treatment.

Some believe the full impact of ADHD is not fully realized because only about twenty-five percent of children and ten percent of adults are ever diagnosed and treated. The ten percent number in adults seems particularly low, and may be, primarily due to the diagnostic criteria which was designed for children as does not accurately reflect the impact of ADHD on adults.

Additionally, many adults struggle muddle through for years with undiagnosed adult ADHD not realizing that there are a number of over the counter homeopathic remedies, behavior therapies such as CBT, along with diet and exercise regimes that could really make a big difference in their lives.

But for the ADHD adult even when they do recognize the condition and seeks out professional help they may be thwarted by the possibility that their ADHD may be co-existing. According to Theresa Cerulli, MD there is a seventy percent chance that common mental health conditions such as clinical depression, bi-polar disorder, OCD, and anxiety will be present.

The impact of ADHD - Workplace and School Hard Facts

The statistics below were compiled during ADHD awareness week by the ADHD Awareness Coalition. I believe you will find them interesting.

Sixty percent of those surveyed said they had lost, or changed, a job or blamed their termination on their ADHD symptoms. Thirty six percent said they have had four jobs or more in the last ten years with seven percent having had ten or more jobs over the course of the last ten years.

Forty-four percent of parents of ADHD children when surveyed said their child was dissatisfied with their school life, with responses ranging from extremely dissatisfied to slightly dissatisfied and forty-one percent saying their child was unhappy with their social status at school.

The survey also indicated that to reduce the impact of attention deficit hyperactivity disorder many turn to exercise with half of adults and thirty-nine percent of children admitting they had used exercise at some point to manage symptoms.

The Impact of ADHD - What Else?

Approximately twenty percent of children with attention deficit hyperactivity disorder has learning disabilities; eighty percent under achieve academically; and forty percent of ADHD children have issues with self-esteem, opposition to authority, depression, or anxiety by the time they reach adolescence.

In conclusion, those with ADHD are generally creative intelligent people who struggle with structure, organization, and fitting into societal norms making the impact of ADHD quite broad ranging and difficult to reverse without a thoughtful comprehensive approach to symptoms management.

Both parents of ADHD children and adults will have many treatment options from which to choose ranging from risky prescription stimulants to alternative methods of treatment such as side effect free homeopathic remedies and behavioral therapy.

That said, most experts agree that the key to leveling the playing field for both ADHD children and adults is embarking on some type of treatment sooner rather than later and then closely monitoring the results for effectiveness.

Five Steps to Stop Your Food Cravings and Prevent Overeating

Oh, no . . . You suddenly realize that you are well on your way to eating more than you had intended. Maybe it's a meal that you've already eaten too much of, or perhaps an unexpected binge. How do you stop? It is not going to be easy, and that is certainly an understatement, but it is possible to find a way to put the brakes on. Use these five steps and discover your inner power to say "no" to food and "yes" to a happier, thinner life.

Step A. Wake Up!

People who use food to feel better often report overeating when they are in a time-out or food trance. This trance provides an escape from inner criticism, difficult emotions, or stressful life situations. The first step is to find some way to wake up from the trance. No matter how intense your food craving, or how much you have already eaten, you have to snap back to reality before anything else can happen. There is no one proven guaranteed way to bring your self back to conscious awareness. You will have to experiment with several different ways to grab your own attention. Below are some suggestions that may work to bring you back into the here and now:

o Walk to the nearest mirror, look yourself deep in the eyes, and say hello to yourself.

o Talk aloud to yourself. Call yourself by name and say, "wake up."

o Shake your head to clear out the cobwebs.

o Take a deep breathe and say to yourself, "I am okay now. I am fine now. I am in control now."

o Plant visual cues in your kitchen. For example, place a special blooming potted plant on your kitchen table. Looking at it might remind you of your potential to bloom and prosper.

o Tape your baby picture on your refrigerator. Look at how pure and happy you are. Decide that you want to feel happy and eating is not the way to get there.

List a few methods you can think of to bring yourself back to living in the present moment:

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Step B. Listen to Your Thoughts

Now that you are awake, stop for ten seconds. Consciously notice the thoughts running through your head. Separate yourself from your thoughts. Just listen without judgment or without trying to stop or change your thoughts. Notice what your thoughts are saying. Are you worrying about the future or reliving the past? Are your thoughts critical and self-sabotaging? Are you thinking in black and white, or believing the worst always happens to you? Perhaps your thoughts are something like this:

o Look at what you've done now.

o Everything that you've worked for is now undone.

o It's going to take so much longer to lose weight now.

o Since you've eaten this much, no reason to stop now.

o What the heck, you've already failed.

o Might as well enjoy it now that you've given in.

o "It's useless. There is no point now in stopping.

Once you hear your thoughts, stop, and acknowledge them. Talk back to them with a non-confrontational style. Something along the lines of, "Yes, I hear what I am saying to myself." Just notice your thoughts without agreeing or arguing with them. You are not required to agree or disagree with them. Simply hear them as an observer. Take a moment and notice the feeling that goes along with the thoughts. Observe where in your body the feeling is, and see if you can identify your feelings or beliefs.

Step C. Breathe

Now, take a deep breath and close your eyes. Breathe in through your nose, allowing the breath to go deeply into your lower belly. Breathe out naturally. Feel yourself breathing. Allow the breath to enter the area of your body that is holding onto the feeling from the step above. Slowly release any tightness or constriction in your body. Let go. Breathe. Relax.

Step D. Compassion and Forgiveness

Talk compassionately to yourself. No matter what has happened or how much you have already eaten, begin speaking kindly to yourself. Yes, I can hear the protests already: "How can I talk nicely to myself when I've just blown it? I hate myself for what I've done." Beating yourself up will not improve your situation or create the overall success you want. Being critical only serves to maintain and reinforce status quo. One episode of overeating will not affect anything in the scheme of things. Choose criticism and you learn nothing, move nowhere. A lack of self-supporting self-talk will lead to negative emotions, decreased motivation, and will turn one episode into an ongoing event. Choose compassion for self and you move forward.

Even if you have already given in to the craving, now is the time to remember your dreams, relocate your desire, and be clear about your direction. Positive thoughts, even in the face of a setback or disappointment will reinforce your destination. It is up to you, and you alone, to make the choice to strengthen your goals and your determination.

Here are some examples:

o I forgive myself for what I have done.

o Now is the time to begin again. I do not need to wait until tomorrow.

o I haven't failed. The only failure is failing to learn something from this experience. What have I learned?

o I am back in control now. I can choose my response from this point forward.

List a few sentences or quotes that will begin to bring calmness and control back to you:

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Step E. Success Tape

If you already know that you have regular episodes of cravings, overeating, or binge eating, you might consider putting a positive self-talk speech on tape. Buy a small, easy to carry digital tape recorder and prepare a self-motivation tape for yourself. The next time you are about to give in to your craving, you can pull out your recorder and hit the play button. You can even use your motivation tape if you are in the middle or the end of overeating. Below is a example of what your pre-recorded self-supporting message might sound like:

"Hello! I see that you woke up from the trance you were in. Congratulations. That's something new. Now that you are back in real time, notice what a good job you did of waking up when you did. You are really putting in the effort to learn these new skills. I am proud of your determination! Yes, I can see that you are disappointed in your actions. It's okay to feel disappointment. It's also okay to forgive yourself. So, close your eyes and listen closely. You are a wonderful person. Yes, you overate, and it's not the end of the world. In truth, it was just one meal. Everything is going to be okay. Remember your goal and remember how good it feels to know what you want. (Fill in your goal). You can do this. I have faith in you. I love you."

Food cravings are not only tough to resist, they are also a typical experience for most people attempting to lose weight. The good news is that by planning ahead you can take action when you need it most. Follow the five steps above and give yourself the tools for permanent weight loss success.

The Great Gatsby - Is Nick Carraway Gay?

In The Great Gatsby Scott Fitzgerald presents a study of wealth and ambition through the prism of pathetic characters for which one can find almost no socially redeeming values.

What The Great Gatsby portrays is the sordid story of small band of feeble characters engaged in cheating, adultery, deception, and debauchery. The lavish parties -Jazz-age style- that Jay Gatsby throws to recover Daisy Buchanan (his lost illusions and perfidious lover) are all but wild bacchanalians.

When one thinks about of the rest of the nation, we can breathe a sigh of relief to see that the rest of Americans are engaged in productive enterprise, in rebuilding the nation after the waste of resources that was the First World War. The sordidness of the story applies, almost in its entirety, to that small band of marginal, misguided, and unsavory characters. It isn't a book about the spiritual dismemberment of America (as many have interpreted the book to be) that came in 1927 with the Great Depression.

While in Ernest Hemingway's short story "The Killers" we experience the objective voice of a disinterested narrator, in the Great Gatsby we are deceived by the relentless biases of Nick Carraway, a likable character --and narrator-- who not only has an interesting story to tell, but also has an agenda. His agenda is a laundry list of things "to clean up," events to smooth over, and a guilty consciousness to cleanse. In a similar vein as the Confessions penned by Augustine, Rousseau, and Ben Franklin, Nick exacerbates other people's crimes and misdemeanors while obscuring and diminishing his own.

From the outset of the narration, Nick Carraway makes it clear that the story he's about to tell is a very personal story, and that he is going to be a protagonist. So, with these words: "In my younger and more vulnerable years..." he begins to tell the story about himself and about young people coming of age, people who at present are in the midst of finding their own identity, groping for goals and a more certain future. It is a generational story in which ambitious Dough Boys-having returned from fighting a world war--vie for position under the sun, vying for a spot not in the tedium of poverty or disenchantment, but for a share of splendor in wealth and love.

Although Nick makes the calculated decision to come East to pursue a career in Wall Street, his heart moves him in a different direction; his heart is in literature, and he lets us know what his intentions are: "I was rather literary in college-one year I wrote a series of very solemn and obvious editorials for the Yale News-and now I was going to bring back all such things into my life and become again that most limited of all specialists, the 'well rounded man.'" (GG, 4).

Having attended Yale University, he is justified in calling himself a 'well rounded man' who is fully equipped by experience, education, and talent to become a writer, a literary man.

As he commences the narrative, he even indulges in the author's pleasure of even knowing the title of his book: "Only Gatsby, the man who gives his name to this book, was exempt from my reaction." (GG, 2). He also engages in moments of meta-narration. When in the second book of Don Quijote the hero learns that he is the subject of spurious adventures by a spurious author, we can only enjoy the pleasures of meta-narration. Nick Carraway also engages himself in bits of meta-narration as when we read that he is reviewing his work as he progresses with the writing:

"Reading over what I have written so far, I see I have given the impression that he events of three nights several weeks apart were all that absorbed me. On the contrary, they were merely casual events in a crowded summer, and, until much later, they absorbed me infinitely less than my personal affairs." (GG, 56).

Indeed they were but mere casual events, yet very much intertwined with his own personal life. Though Nick presents the Gastby life as the main thread, his own autobiographical strands of data are weaved into the fabric of the story.

While Meursault-Camus' absurd-man narrator of The Stranger chooses a stark, hallucinatory jargon to depict his alienation from the world, Nick Carraway chooses a lyrical and often incantatory language to embellish the sordid world of a low-level American tragedy.

Nick takes licenses and reports hearsay, a narrator's sin that endangers his credibility. What is disgusting is that in the end, Nick doesn't denounce his cousin Daisy, even though he's privy to the knowledge that Daisy was the driver that fated night, and that Daisy kills Myrtle Wilson (Tom's mistress). Was this really an accident? Or did Daisy actually run over Mrs. Wilson intentionally? We can only go by Gatsby's recollection of the accident as he recounts it to Nick.

That Daisy was driving and that she was maneuvering to pass a car coming the other way is clear. What follows is that Daisy first attempts avoid hitting Myrtle, but it is possible that as she recognizes Myrtle she changes her mind and runs over her. After all Myrtle Wilson has been a constant thorn in her flesh throughout the summer, causing her much pain, anxiety, and depression.

While Nick tells us there was an inquest, he omits telling us that he didn't testify, despite the fact that his truthful testimony would have implicated his cousin Daisy. Nick then is complicit in the cover up of a hit and run crime. Furthermore, the night of the accident when Nick plays peeping Tom, he observes Daisy and Tom in a conspiratorial tete-a-tete:

"The weren't happy, and neither of them had touched the chicken or the ale-and yet they weren't unhappy either. There was an unmistakable air of natural intimacy about the picture, and anybody would have said that they were conspiring together." (GG, 145).

In Garcia Marquez's novel One Hundred Years of Solitude, when Remedios the Beauty ascends to heaven, the reader accepts this fact because the woman in her simple mindedness never sees that her beauty hurts people; or even kills them. But when Nick Carraway paints Daisy as a southern beauty filled with charm and innocence, he scratches a discordant note, for her actions belie that.

Is Nick Gay or Bisexual? Nick has a fixation with noses and we see this under-text surface throughout the narration, and the only way to break the habit is by actually "breaking" it violently just as Tom Buchanan does when he breaks his mistress's nose. In addition, Daisy compares Nick to a flower: "Nick, you remind me of a--of a rose, an absolute rose." Is she implying Nick is a closeted gay? Well, Nick never pursues Jordan with the vigor of a male in heat. And there's a scene in which another male removes his garments.

During a get-together in New York, Nick meets Mr. McKee, a photographer: "Mr. McKee was a pale, feminine man from the flat below. He had just shaved, for there was a white spot of lather on his cheekbone (30)." Afterwards McKee takes Nick to his home where they spend the night. Nick later remembers: "I was standing beside his bed and he was sitting up between the sheets, clad in his underwear."

To confirm McKee's homosexuality and by implication Nick's, we see a phallic image as the elevator boy warns "hands off the lever." To which McKee responds "I beg your pardon...I didn't know I was touching it." Was McKee touching the lever or the elevator boy? Early in the Twentieth Century, American literature had certain taboos that an author could only approach and conquer as the Jew conquered Jericho-around and around and with noise. The noise being the carefully selected word-codes and phallic imagery.

Can anyone imagine a heterosexual man obssessing about another man?:

"Mr. McKee was asleep on a chair with his fists clenched in his lap, like a photograph of a man of action. Taking out my handkerchief I wiped from his cheek the remains of the spot of dried lather that had worried me all the afternoon." (p.36)

Nick Carraway, the narrator, never acknowledges that he is an amiable pimp. Nick rents his West Egg house with a male, "when a young man at the office suggested that we take a house together in a commuting town, it sounded like a great idea. He found the house, a weather-beaten cardboard bungalow at eighty a month, but at the last minute the firm ordered him to Washington, and I went out to the country alone." (p3).

If Nick isn't gay, then he is bisexual: "I even had a short affair with a girl who lived in Jersey City and worked in the accounting department, but her brother began throwing mean looks in my direction, so when she went on her vacation in July I let it blow quietly away." (p56).

And as he meanders through midtown Manhattan, he fantasizes: "I liked to walk up Fifth Avenue and pick out romantic women from the crowd and imagine that in a few minutes I was going to enter into their lives, and no one would ever know or disapprove. Sometimes, in my mind, I followed them to their apartments on the corners of hidden street, and they turned and smiled back at me before they faded through a door into warm darkness." (p56).

Notice Nick's self-examination that carry the despairing musings of old maids, spinsters, and old bachelors: "I was thirty. Before me stretched the portentous, menacing road of a new decade (p135)." As he looks down the lane of bachelorhood at this point in his life, Nick considers a life-presumably a sexual life with single men only: "The Thirty-the promise of a decade of loneliness, a thinning list of single men to know, a thinning briefcase of enthusiasm, thinning hair." (p135). This is a poignant remark that confirms his loneliness and how he will comfort himself in his bacherlohood.

Nick Carraway presents himself as a simple, unassuming, and likeable character, who thrives in gaining the confidence of friends and strangers alike. Yet, there's nothing simple about him. As his narrative progresses and we get to know him better, we conclude that he is a complex character with many facets.

While many sides of his personality are interesting, the reader cannot help being seduced by the moralistic preponderance of his judgments. On the surface, Nick presents himself as the voice of measure, reason, and virtue, but as we scrutinize his deeper strata we find an array of wild emotions, impulses, desires, and irrationalities that border on an unstable, sexually confused life, as he himself acknowledges: "Conduct may be founded on the hard rock or the wet marhes, but after a certain point I don't care what's founded on." (GG, 2).