The Fear-Anger-Depression Cycle

There is a direct link, often overlooked and minimised, between the emotional states of Fear, Anger and Depression. I will break down each emotion separately first to explain further...

• Fear is a distressing emotional state or feeling that is induced by a perceived threat. It is a basic survival mechanism and gives us the ability to recognise danger and flee from it or deal with it head on - also known as the Fight or Flight response. It is important to distinguish fear from anxiety which can occur without any perceived external threat. With Fear, the threat can be real or imagined.


• At it's core, Anger is a signal to us that something in our environment isn't right. It gives us a sense of power in powerless situations and the illusion of control in an uncontrollable situations. For the duration of the anger episode, a person does not have to feel the distressing Fear of the perceived threat or condition and can feel empowered instead. The Fight or Flight hormones of Adrenaline and Cortisol help this enormously.


• Every day Depression (as opposed to depression caused by a death, a major life event or other trauma inducing situation) is invariably caused by bottled up and stuffed anger and according to Louise L. Hay (of "You Can Heal You Life" and Hay House Publishing fame), is anger you DO NOT FEEL YOU HAVE A RIGHT TO HAVE. When people do not express their anger (and other emotions - especially negative ones) it builds up inside them and manifests in the form of reactive or clinical depression.

As well as building up over a period of time, incredibly, it is also possible to go from fear to anger to depression in seconds without even being aware how you even got there. The body and mind (conscious and subconscious) are so interconnected and so incredibly amazing that they can process the perceived threat, give the body the adrenaline and cortisol to "Fight or Flight" and then stuff the anger - all in seconds - if the subconscious tells the body it is not safe to express that anger in relation to the perceived threat. An extreme example of this would be the spouse of a violent partner not feeling safe to assertively respond to a violence incident.

The rate of depression differs between women and men. A loose estimate is that 1 in 4 women verses 1 in 10 men experience depression at any one time. Maybe this is connected to societal programming which teaches females that being angry (or indeed expressing emotions of any kind) is not ladylike verses men who are not exposed to this same programming. This view was supported after the results of a study were published of male and female prisoners which found that when incarcerated, women tend to self harm as a way of expressing their pain whereas men will fight. The fear-anger-depression cycle is heightened in women therefore who much of the time are not even aware that they are even angry at all such is the power of their programming.

Do yourself a favor... whether you are male or female, next time you feel the onset of anger or depression, ask yourself as soon as you reasonably can "what am I fearful about?". This will save you a lot of unnecessary pain in the short, medium and long term as you get honest with yourself about what is really going on with you.

ADHD Teenagers and Depression

I want to tell you about two teenagers, they were confidant in different areas of their lives. One can sand in front of a group with confidant embracing the excitement and have fun with what he is doing. The other is shy, nervous would rather be in the group of spectators and not in the spot light.

Depression was not a part of who they where, then puberty hit and signs of depression seem to manifest overnight. Trouble with grades, disconnecting with friends and not paying attention to teachers or parents are a warning that something is wrong. What does ADHD have to do with depression? These conditions may go hand in hand if your child has ADHD depending on the diagnoses. It is devastating to your child and they don't understand it either.

Teens are sometimes labeled lazy, especially when they show high intelligence, confidence in sports and excitement about taking leadership roles. This describes the first child. As a teen you switch class everyday and when it came to school work there was no balance and the grade suffered. The parents could see that the teen was not lazy. Confidence in all areas of life were affected and the focused was not there in maintaining grades or anything else.

Setting goals and supporting teens in areas that they struggling is frustrating. As they work on the grades that had slipped bringing them up, the grades that where great fell below average. Tutors, parents, and the teen felt the frustration. Searching for answers is not easy and teens just don't know why they are struggling. Depression, frustration and ADHD were a part of the school year. An Educational Therapist explained how ADHD can have a variety of unexplained symptoms and behaviors. Meeting with the teens and evaluating them he thought they should seek the help of a psychiatrist to get a diagnosis and possibly medication. When a child looks at you and says something is not right and I want you to help me. You will do anything.

Diagnosed with ADHD and depression the next question was, is the ADHD causing the depression or is the depression causing the ADHD? Only one way to find out five months of therapy did not help in this teens life or school work, so the next step was to try medication.The medication for ADHD is like turning on a switch. The teens went from failing to the honor roll in one marking period. The first teen maintained his grades, learned to drive, passed written test and yet still did not show excitement in doing so well.

Depression took over; the teen was doing well but could not find joy in anything. Started medication for depression and is in therapy. This teen has depression and ADHD.

The other teen who has been in learning support since kindergarten was struggling more than ever, struggling to stay on task. Hours to do home work that should have only taken forty-five minutes. Happy go lucky even though this teens grades where average but below grade level. This teen would just shut down and not care about school or doing anything else is he struggling with ADHD. A diagnosis of ADHD is confirmed and is now on medication. He does not have depression.

Medication has helped these teens in ways the parents could not. They are now doing well and are happy. The symptoms they had are very different and depending on your child you may see a variety of behaviors that can only be helped and treated by a psychiatrist. When you see that your child is struggling with depression it may relate to ADHD, only a Psychiatrist should diagnose and prescribe medication monitoring them regularly.

No one knows your child like you. Signs that he or she is struggling because they seem lazy and are showing signs of depression is not "just being a teenager". Work with the school, a therapist and if needed find a Psychiatrist that works with children. The teens are thriving and the parents know they are getting the tools that will lead them to adulthood with confidence and a clear understanding in how to manage their mental health.

In quietness and in trusting confidence I find strength. ISAIAH 30:15

Behavioral and Emotional Symptoms of Depression

Depression can occur to everyone, whether man or woman. People can feel depressed of any situation and things. Examples of depression cause are misunderstanding marriage, tussle with teen kids, or often people feel down for no reason at all.

Your depression can change into illness, if the mood state is severe. Before your depression getting worst, you must recognize the symptoms of this situation. Once you know that you are depressed, you'll be able to heal it right away.

There are two symptoms you must know, behavioral and emotional. Get all those signs to help you prevent bad depressed condition and cure it immediately.

• Behavioral Symptoms

1. Difficulty in Setting Your Goals
If you find it hard to see the positive future for yourself, it can be means you also get trouble to set goal of your own dreams. You can see it from loss of control and structure in life with many duties unfinished.

2. Loss Motivation
Lack of motivation will indicate that you are suffering depression. It will give impact for all aspects in your life and influence your job also life.

3. Can't Think Clearly
Someone with depression condition, often get difficulty in making decision and think clearly. You can't see the situation objectively, so you can't make any decisions even for the smallest problem, such as what to eat.
4. Solving Problems
As the depression sufferers, the small thing can be huge problem for you. Usually, it often comes out without apparent solution.

5. Social Withdrawal
Social activity is can be very unattractive for people who get depressed. Most of them will pull out themselves from any social interaction.

• Emotional Symptoms

1. Guilt
Depression people will feel guilty for any particular issue and make them have excessive worry.

2. Loss Self Confidence
By withdrawing yourself from social interaction, it means the confidence is reduced. You are like to live your own life in your own world.

3. Apathy
It is one of feeling that will happen to you if you are suffering depression. It will influence your ability to do all today tasks. For you the fun activity that you usually do, will not fun anymore.

4. Pessimistic
Depression sufferer will often have pessimistic thoughts and it's hard to think positively. You'll see that your future is hard to reach and there'll no beneficial or positive aspect in your life.

5. Suicidal Thoughts
Almost all depression sufferers will feel their present is so awful and future is worst. They will see that life is simply not worth to live and they will in rush to end their life.

The Five Elements of Happiness

Birth, life, death... What else? What happens in between is what makes life worth living - the elements of happiness. Do you want to be happy? You can be, if you know what it takes to be happy and then act on it.

The Five Elements of Happiness

1) Purpose: When you find purpose, and you work to fulfil that purpose, you will also find happiness.

a) Use your talents. You were born to succeed in something only you can succeed on.

b) Find your mission. You have a mission in life. When you realize what you were born to achieve and start working to achieve it, you will also find happiness.

c) Put your priorities in order. What is important to you? The labouring on meaningless tasks contributes to your unhappiness. Do what it's important; do what you love.

d) Act on your intuition. You have a built in compass inside yourself. Listen to that gut feeling, it is telling you where to go, and what to do.

e) Never lose sight. The circumstances of life might cloud your vision. It is important to remember yourself of what is important, what your purpose is.

2) Meditate: We are thinking beings. We can act upon our emotions, but we can also act under the wise direction of our intellect.

a) Stop and see what comes ahead. Sometimes we need to see with the eyes of reason, before we can take action.

b) Don't act on impulses, but act on intuition. When you meditate on the circumstances, you are not blind; even if something bad happens, it will be expected and accepted.

c) Prioritize. It is better to think before acting, than to act without thinking. Because the majority of times you will win for reasoning, and lose for acting on impulse.

d) Believe in the power of meditation. The riches of enlightenment are far greater than the time invested.

e) You don't have to be good at meditation, and you don't have to learn. Just find a quiet place, relax, and think... until enlightenment comes.

3) Give: Someone once said, "It is more blessed to give..."

a) Enrich other people's lives, and your life will be rich too. I like to think of this as "divine justice". It is as if a system was put in place to keep the selfish from achieving true happiness.

b) Be true in your giving - give with no strings attached, for when you give freely, it is appreciated, but when you demand recompense, it is daunting.

c) The true giver gives the best. They do not choose the least valuable to others, while keeping to best to themselves. This works in two levels... the best becomes less valuable when not shared. Moreover, the less valuable, when given away, only delivers disappointment. As you can see, nothing is profited.

d) Don't expect in return. A gift is not a gift, but an extension of credit, if it's not given wholeheartedly. No one remembers fondly of their creditors, for they are the ones to whom they owe.

e) Don't expect to receive credit; it will only lead to frustration. If the only reason to give is to receive, you will ultimately fail. In addition, in time, your gifts will no longer be appreciated, as they are too expensive to the receiver.

4) Take good care of yourself: The body you were born in is the body you will die in.

a) Your body is the source and the recipient of your emotions. Therefore, keep it well, because no happiness can ever come from disease and poor health.

b) The better you feel, the better you feel ... Isn't it obvious? Why is it so widely ignored? If you stop ignoring this truth, happiness will draw closer to your life.

c) Your body also has a purpose. It was made to run, to walk, to work and to love. Don't deny your body its purpose, for you cannot fully achieve your purpose if you neglect your body's.

d) Understand what your body is telling you. A higher wisdom is in place, and it is not wise to disregard it. Your body is you, and so is your consciousness. It is all connected. Meditation can ease the interaction between all the parts of your being, making you whole.

e) Reward yourself. True reward has long-term value. It is up to you to make the right choice. The rewards you give yourself bring happiness if they are truly beneficial to your life. However, they can cause damage if they are nothing but small pleasures. An example would be the comparison between a trip to a memorable destination for a nice holiday, and the binging on food, alcohol and drugs. The latter will have costly consequences to your life, and to your happiness.

5) Love: But what is it? Love has many names, but only one meaning...

a) It is the fuel of life, the ultimate reward. Without it, life has no meaning, no purpose. When you love and are loved, you feel alive... happy. A person without love feels lonely, depressed, and dead.

b) It is counter-intuitive, because it is more pleasurable when given, than when received.

c) It is generally misunderstood, and taken for granted. True love is sadly not regarded as valuable. Its misconceptions are praised by the masses in the form of skin-deep romantic endeavours on TV.

d) Love is the most valuable treasure a poor man has, and the most mistreated asset of the rich man. The rich does not need to love if he believes that the power of money can buy it. On the other hand, the poor only has love itself to offer in order to receive love in return.

e) Know the true meaning of love. Find out for yourself, by asking questions. Is it sex, relationship, charity, friendship, marriage? I could tell you what I think it is. However, this question seems to require a self-realized answer in order to provide the true power of its impact in your life. I urge you to seek the answer until you find it. When you do find it, you will have it... love... happiness.

Do you want to be happy? Do you know what it takes to be happy? If it is valuable to you, labour for its rewards, because it will be the job of your life when the wages of your work are paid in the form of the ultimate commodity: happiness.

The Hearing Test and Depression

A hearing test could help with depression or anxiety. If you notice that you or someone you love seems depressed, anxious, or just out of sorts, you would be wise to consider what needs to be done. Depression and anxiety are usually symptoms of an underlying problem. If you are struggling with your ability to hear, that may be the problem without you even realizing that it is.

If you have always been able to hear fine, you may have never pictured what it is like to have a problem like this. Perhaps your problem has been coming on gradually, and maybe now you are at a point where you really feel like you are separated from the group because you just cannot understand conversations. Maybe you are beginning to read faces and try to follow in that way. One of these times, you may slip-up and be embarrassed because of it.

Embarrassment may cause you to stay home from parties, and before you know it, you will be feeling lonely and depressed. When you do go out in public, you might feel anxious. The underlying cause is an inability to hear. Unfortunately, many people likely go through what you are feeling every day.

If you know that your problem is because you cannot hear, then you should go and get a hearing test. A clinic will help you know what steps to take next so that you can get over this hurdle that is keeping you back from loving life.

It is important to really get a handle on this quickly. The way you think and feel can easily become habitual, and you may still have a difficult time once you are not struggling to hear. Make an appointment to get in for a free hearing test, and from that moment on, try to control the way you think and allow yourself to feel. Remind yourself that your feelings are based on your perceptions of how others react to you because you cannot hear. Remind yourself that you might be acting strangely because you have not been able to hear well.

Going and getting a hearing test is the first step in the right direction. From there, you might need some counsel so that you can learn how to think correctly and positively again. Before you know it, you will be yourself and be interacting with friend as you once did.

Depression: Knowing When It's Not A Sad Spell

It's easy to say after a hard day, "I'm depressed", but when you think of it, most of us will have forgotten that we even said that by the next day or at least within a few days. Any normal human being will go through a rough time when they lose a loved one to death or separation, when they can't figure out how to pay the next bill, when they haven't slept in months due to a new baby or when the sun hasn't shone in three weeks. So, even though at that moment it does seem serious, when do you know if it's the real thing? When does it become a clinical depression?

Any item in the list of the most common symptoms of depression can be due to other causes, like a physical disorder or illness. And anybody can be feeling at least one symptom at any given time. So before you go and diagnose yourself with clinical depression, make sure you're suffering from more that one symptom and talk to your doctor.

A person suffering from a clinical depression will usually experience these symptoms:

- A difficulty falling asleep and/or sleeping through the night. They may also wake up early and be unable to go back to sleep. Many feel that they dream all night, the dreams often being of a very disturbing nature.

- A feeling of complete exhaustion with not even enough energy to carry out daily tasks.

- A constant feeling of sadness and misery. Not even the things that usually bring them joy have any effect. They will start crying for no specific reason.

- Feeling that they are a failure in every aspect. They may ponder on the past and the mistakes they have made in the past, are making in the present and will make in the future. This all brings on a feeling of hopelessness, as if life will not get any better and is ultimately not even worth living. Though a depressive person might not be suicidal, in many cases thought of death and suicide are constantly in the back of their mind.

- A person suffering from a depression will either not want to see anyone at all or be terrified of being left alone.

- They have no interest and joy in things that they used to love, such as hobbies. In most cases, interest in sex will disappear completely. Though they may not have an appetite, they might stuff themselves with food to find comfort.

- Though depressed people often seem subdued, they might become irritable and angry for little or no reason.

- Low self-esteem and lack of confidence.

- A feeling that life is unfair.

- Though they might spend the day not doing anything and without the will to do anything, they still feel that life is passing them by.

Depression not only causes emotional pain, in many cases it also brings on physical pain, such as back pain and headaches. These usually cannot be explained by the medical profession and will not go away through treatment such as therapeutic massages or medication. Other physical symptoms of depression are constipation or other digestive problems, chest pain and dizziness. Any of these conditions could imply something else and should be checked out by a doctor. If the patient has a tendency to suffer depression, it should be mentioned to the physician.

How Do You Know If You Have Manic-Depression

Nancy was doing very well until about two years ago when Phil, her boyfriend of 9 years, broke-up with her. It was a difficult moment for her especially after she learned that Phil eventually married her cousin. Since then, Nancy had deteriorated. One evening, she was involved in a motor vehicular accident because she was driving fast and recklessly in a quiet suburban neighborhood.

During interrogation, the cops noted that Nancy was talking rapidly and nobody could interrupt her. Also, she was making jokes and laughing so loud. She further indicated to them that she was on her way to meet the President and his top officials about her invention that could cure the oil crunch. She eventually ended up in the emergency room where she was diagnosed and treated for bipolar disorder after intensive evaluation.

Bipolar disorder or manic-depression is manifested by highs and lows. When a patient like Nancy is on the manic side, there is a persistent feeling of euphoria or irritability associated with lack of need for sleep, excessive energy, agitation, fast and loud speech, increase in goal-directed activities such as spending sprees and establishing businesses with no appropriate plan, and hypersexuality.

Patients with this disorder develop poor judgment and impulsivity. They become irritable and can lash out easily even if not provoked. Some patients have delusions of grandeur. When this happens, patients think that they have special powers, talents, and influence.

When not manic, patients either feel normal or depressed. Depression in bipolar disorder has the same manifestation as major depression that consists of feelings of sadness associated with neurovegetative signs and symptoms such as inability to sleep, eat, and concentrate. Energy level is also impaired. In addition, patients experience a feeling of hopelessness, worthlessness, and helplessness. Suicidal ideation may ensue.

For individuals who develop mania, does it always mean that they suffer from bipolar disorder?

Not necessarily. Mania can be caused by various medical and neurologic conditions. For instance, multiple sclerosis and stroke can present with manic symptoms. Moreover, medications and street drugs may precipitate mania. Steroids, cocaine, and amphetamine are some examples. Even some antidepressants can induce mania.

So when a person shows mania, the physician usually does intensive evaluation to rule out medical, neurologic, and medication-induced conditions before diagnosing bipolar disorder. This process is important because the treatment varies depending upon the cause. Once other conditions are ruled out, then bipolar disorder can be safely diagnosed and treated.